I surrender all?

O, Valentine’s Day.  Not my favorite holiday considering I haven’t ever had a Valentine.  Oh well, I have made it through 24 of them just fine; one more can’t hurt me too much!  Actually, it can’t hurt me at all unless I allow it to.  I decide how I react to situations, I control me attitude – it does not control me.  Haha I sound like I am in a recovery program…which I guess I kind of am now that I think about it.  I still struggle with the emotional problems of my eating disorder and body image and the devil knows that and can get into my head very easily.

I am reading through Matthew now and a verse that continually jumps out at me is Matthew 11:28-30 -“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

How wonderful is that?  Jesus is calling us to give Him our struggles and worries to take His peace that he freely offers.  If only I could do that as easily as I would like to.  I read that and think about how awesome it is, but can I do that?  I get in my own way and think that I can solve the problems.  I know better, I can fix it. Wrong.

During Tuesday night Bible study we were singing Hillsong “Arms Open Wide”:

“Take my life I lay it down

At the cross where I am found

All I have I give to You oh God

Take my hands and make them clean

Keep my heart in purity

That I may walk in all You have for me

Oh here I stand

Arms open wide

Oh I am Yours

And You are mine

Take my moments and my days

Let each breath that I take

Be ever only for You oh God

Oh here I stand

Arms open wide

Oh I am Yours

And You are mine”

During this song I was reminded of something I had heard in the previous week and it really struck me that night. We are standing there singing asking for God to take our life to do His will, take our hands to make them clean and complete His work….we are asking Him to take them?  God would take them if we would actually let go and let Him have it.  It is as if we are waiting for Him to slap them out of our hands Himself, because we are clinging to these things and won’t truly let them go.  We sing of surrendering, but do we really surrender?  I don’t think that we have to ask God to take our lives; He is waiting for us to let go!

Just one of the many random thoughts that go through my head that I felt like putting out there for the world.  Well, for your guys that read this 🙂

Dude, I got a random call on Friday from a trainer in a local gym about my interest in learning Olympic lifts.  It has been a few months since I asked about it, so I am not sure how he got my information, and I didn’t care enough at the time to ask. I just said yes!  I meet with him tomorrow for my initial assessment and then he will have a couple of weeks to start getting me a plan together and will start training me on proper form and all of that jazz.  I’m really excited learning the lifts and think that it will be a good change of workouts and increase my strength.  Plus, he sounded cute on the phone so we will see if my blood pressure gets as high as it did during my last assessment! Cute boys checking my blood pressure is really not an accurate read….

Speaking of that cute boy, I get my program delivery tomorrow at work.  I am not sure if he is too embarrassed to work with me on it or will leave it to the female trainer….I am going to be hopeful that I didn’t freak him out.  Maybe he thought my attraction was flattering, not awkward and embarrassing?  We shall see tomorrow afternoon.

I’ll keep you posted on the trainer situation….


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